Cup Of Joe...

Starting my day off with a big cup of coffee. I will be practicing my thesis speech all day (I go tomorrow.) I just want it to be over with. I told my self that I wouldn't worry but I know I'm gonna get anxious. But you can't ever start a day off without coffee :) Happy Wednesday!

Peace and Love,

Em

Countdown...

As of last night day one of Senior Thesis is done.

We are so close!

Sarah and I had a little photoshoot.

Peace and Love,

Em

Hoping for Closure...

It's that time of year again where I am in full thesis mode. This year I seem to be more motivated than I was last year. I think it has something to do with my topic. Last year I wrote about film and how it creates our culture. I loved this topic, don't get me wrong. But this year I am writing about something a little more personal. I am writing about Anorexia as a mental disease.

I struggled with Anorexia a while back for two years. It's still something I struggle with and I know that I always will to some degree. It was the hardest thing that I have ever been through. It was only because of my supportive and loving family and friends, medical treatment, and God that I got better. But I went through a lot of trials and none of them were easy. One of the hardest things I deal with now in the aftermath is hearing people talk about Anorexia like they have it all figured out, when even the doctors specializing in the subject don't fully understand it. People have told me that it's merely a petty self-induced problem. I hate this. Anorexia is one of those things that you can't understand until you go through it. It is literally a demon that lives inside of you and controls you. That's why I chose to write my thesis on the disorder this year. I want to open people's eyes and show them how complex and painful this disorder is.

I have been relatively quiet when it comes to my own experience with the disease but I think I am at the point where I am ready to talk about it with anybody who is willing. I want to be able to help other girls who are struggling with it. I also think that researching and writing a thesis on this subject from the perspective of someone who has suffered from it will be very interesting. I am ready to face some of the things I wasn't willing to before with this paper. I'm looking at it as some form of closure. I know I will never be completely rid of the disorder but there are somethings I am ready to let go of.
I have so many books on the subject and am so interested in it that I can't stop reading. I'm going to do my best to represent those suffering from the disorder in a proper way. I am ready to talk about everything. All I can Hope for is that people will listen.

Peace and Love,

Em

Deep Breaths...

My face has permanently been like this for weeks. School work might be the death of me. I don't want to hear the word thesis at all this summer. Only a few more weeks to go though and then I am done and off to Europe! Painting and reading are like the only things I want to do right now. I need to concentrate, that's what I need to do.

Hope everyone's week continues to be sunny.

Peace and Love,

Em

I Can Barely Contain Myself...

I am so excited for this album. I just watched the show where they premiered the album and it is AMAZING!!! I will be in Europe when it comes out but I am pre-ordering it so that it will be here waiting for me when I get back. I cannot wait until I can hold this cd in my hands and play it over and over again. It's SO good!

Oh, and in case you haven't heard, my computer crashed yesterday which has left me in a state of stress. My final thesis was due today and it shut down when I was finishing it so I still have that burden to bear for a while. Also, I am taking my second SAT tomorrow. Pray that it goes well. I am super nervous for some reason and spending 4-5 hours in a room taking a test is no way to spend your Saturday morning.

Hope everyone else enjoys sleeping in and sipping their coffee to their heart's content tomorrow.

Love,
Em

Thankful...

Despite the bad things that happened to day I am thankful. It was not the best day of the week and yet I am reminded of how great my God is and all that he does. Suzanne wrote this on my arm today and it made me feel good. Alyssa left an encouraging note on my desk along with a Bible verse which was just what I needed. My thesis adviser stayed with me two hours after school to help me with an outline and she drove me home.

Today I am thankful for my nest friends.

I am thankful for thesis advisers.

I am thankful love.

I am thankful for music.

I am thankful for my God.

I am thankful for life.

Let's not take all that we have for granted.

Peace and Love, Em

Working On Thesis...

Hey guys! Just finished up my oral exams a couple of hours ago and boy am I glad they are done :) I think as a whole everything went really well. Now I am blessed with two full days to work on thesis. Yuck :( I just want to cuddle up with a good book and watch movies all day, but C'est la vie. Hope everyone has been enjoying their week so far!

Peace and Love,

Em